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Readers Respond: Cheating Husband, Cheating Boyfriend - What Did You Do About It?

Responses: 248

By

is he cheating?

Stupidly I've been the other woman for almost 18 months. I didn't know about this until 2 weeks ago that he was married and had 2 children. We lived together and he was only home during the day because he told me he worked nights and I believed him because he drives a taxi. I only found out about his wife and kids because his brother beat me up then a few days later I seen his brother again and he explained that his wife was his best friend and they have 2 children and his daughter is disabled. He has split with his wife now but only sees me from 7 till 11 pm we done have sex anymore because of his illness or so he tells me. Is he cheating on me? Bearing in Ming he's been married 14 year and got away with being unfaithful for that long. How do I know without confronting him?
—Guest becca

What!!! GUEST DECENT GUY

Guest decent guy. Grow up. Do you think you are going to pick up in here? I've got honest advice for you women. Guys need sex and attention. As soon as you start pushing him away when he tries to cuddle at night and stop giving him sex, know that he is going to see other women as a whole lot sexier. It doesn't matter how special you are, the honey moon period will wear off. As for Decent guy, he is probably single because he is a creepy try hard who lies to vulnerable girls.
—Guest Tony

I should have seen it.

After almost two years, he finally confessed how unfaithful he has been. But not before getting me to sign a 12 month lease with him. And what's worse- I had to confront him first. He never would have told me that he slept with two women and has been sexting numerous girls for the entire duration of our "relationship". I'm usually so insightful... How could I miss this one?
—Guest Naive

A ring don't mean he's yours

So my fiance cheated on me, I went through his phone and found it.. After 5 years of dating and being engaged I thought this was for real. He told me he didn't feel I loved him, and I deserved to be cheated on.. I feel like he hates every second around me, but begged me when I left. What should I do?
—Guest Sadgirl

spite,

I have been on and off with my boyfriend for now the past 8 months, and just before we were reaching our 7 months, he cheated on me, and he went to youth. the thing is, at this time, we were only together, because we were just unsure of things. but that is his excuse ofr cheating on me. "that we were not together" and he will hold it to me, to this day, that it doesnt count, but we were trying to work out our differences. The thing is he didnt tell me, because when he arrived back from youth i phoned him and everything was 'alright', then it came to one of my friends who decided that they would tell me, after i read this. i phoned him and he kept putting down, and never spoke. finally i think he grew enough courage and answered the phone, and said those exact words to me.. after a few days i found out he cheated on me again, with the same doll. on valentines day. and we were dating then. sounds crazy. all in all i told him i forgave him, and we are going on to 9 months.
—Guest Guestc

DISTROYED

IS THERE REALLY GOOD MEN OUT THERE THAT DONT WANT TO CHEAT. MY EX HUSBAND IS LIVING WITH OUR FEMALE FRIEND, BOTH OF THEM DONT WANT TO ADMIT WHAT THEY DID? AM I CRAZY? I SAW HIS EYES, HE WAS IN LOVE WITH HER. AND HE MADE MY LIFE A LIVING HELL. WHY WOULD HE DO THAT WHEN HE IS THE GUILTY ONE. WHY IS HE SO HAPPY NOW? I TRIED MY BEST TO MAKE HIM HAPPY AND TO CHANGE MY LIFE TO SUIT HIM. GOD, WHY DID HE HURT ME SO MUCH?
—Guest DISTROYED

he cheated...

i went to the hospital an he slept with my friend an lied an is still lyin,
—Guest pixie

Im moving on ...

As of last month I have finished my first year of school to be an electrician. I couldn't be happier. Yet there will always be a part of me that longs for the life I thought I had. Thought being the most relevant part of that statement. I could go into details like the 18 year old, the suite he tried to put in my house for one of his girls, the new vehicles and toys he impressed them with, the naked pictures he took (unknowingly) of me in the shower that he sent to his girlfriends, the abortion he made one get, the idea that he picked one woman up from a 7 - 11, or that he flirted with every woman he met regardless if I or his four children were present. Through all of this I am thankful for my four children, that I am slowly exiting depression, that I have no diseases, that I have lost weight, that I have purchased my own (non fancy) home for my children and I and that I am free from the emotional abuse that was so rampant in my life. The road ahead is bright so I won't look bac
—tanngull

wow, even younger than me

so my boyfriend is talking to another girl, i'm 18 and he is 20. they haven't done anythong that i know of yet, i swear men are dogs sometimes, he also used to "hangout" with his ex all the time and i have no clue what they did either. am i crazy for still being with him?
—Guest autumn

too many lies to turn back...

Its hard to know that someone you thought really loved you had been lying to you about being with someone else. you heart is crushed and u feel trapped in ur own pain. I just recently broke up with my bf who was my fiancee and also im nine months pregnant with his son. i went on his facebook today and noticed his ex leaving him a very revealing comment that they suggest them being toghether. Im so hurt because i still love him and i dont know how to let him go. but he hurt me and i will never bounce back. Basically never turn away from the signs. no matter how much you may think theyre not there u can't avoid or ignore the truth and it will come out eventually. It comes to a point u have to choose..who do u really love. Him or urself. and u cant continuously subject urself to abuse...
—Guest brokenheartedgrl

crushed!!

My boyfriend has lived with me for 1 year and 4 months...we both found a job and we now have our own vehicle....and I thought we were happy....i let him go hangout with his cousins one night while i stayed home....well little did i know that was a mistake..I had these wierd feelings the whole time he was gone! but i never once thought he would do something to hurt me...well i thought wrong...we had a perfect day......did alot of things together and then headed home to relax..well i was useing his phone and stumbled across some text messages from him to his cousin...well I found out that the night before he came home he had cheated on me with one of what i thought was my friends...when i confronted him he didnt know what to say....i feel so used....i love this man with all my heart so i decided to let him stay...but idk if i did the right thing....i am just so hurt!!!!
—shortie420

cauht red-handed

I found out my boyfriend had been cheating on me from day one with his ex. He was the one who was always doing the chasing, since i met him at a reunion party 2 years ago. He wanted me to marry him and live with him within 5 months of us going out. I found it all overwhelming, but, like a fool i believed him, till a year into the relationship i found weird coded texts on his phone, i rang the number and it went straight through to his ex's ansafone, so i waited till he was in the shower (getting ready to be with her/football with his mates) and text her pretending to be him and cancelled the date,and turned up instead. His face was a picture, caught red-handed. We broke up and within days he was back with his ex, who was always posting up pics and loved-up messages on facebook, yet I know he has since cheated on her too. Me i just felt relieved to have an excuse to get away from him if i am totally honest
—Guest Ladina

husbands lie and cheat but wives win

Married 16 years and my husband cheating on me with a co-worker. It's the 4th time, mind you. Well, it's over.
—Guest lisa

confused

i was reading the above and i can't beleive how much it sounds like my relationship. i love the one from decent guy. i just found out that a few months ago my guy cheated on me with a stripper. he met her at the strip club and went out with her a few times. he tells me he loves me everyday and holds me so close at night i can hardly breathe. i asked him how he would feel if i was with another man doing... all those things. he denies it and is now mad at me for saying about other men. i was giving him an example and he knows i would never do that but he has turned it on me as though it is my fault. he left me and keeps sending me nasty messages that i am a w@#$% how is that possible? why blame me for saying something when he is the one who went elsewhere. our sex life is great and he claims how amazing and beautiful and sexy i am. please explain that one.
—Guest just me

Heartless

I have been in relationship with an Indian man for 4 yrs. Our relationship is great, he is loving, gentle & very caring. Until I found out that he is cheating on me with a Mexican girl for the last 6 months. The worst thing about it too is he told the girl that were no longer together & I'm just obsessed with him. Then the Mexican girl gave him another chance after 2 days she found out too that they were not just 2 but actually 3. She told me about it and my heart is soo much in pain. I still want him in my life but I don't want to get hurt anymore. I wish that he will stop hurting other girls the way he did hurt me.
—Guest Asian girl....

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