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Readers Respond: How Old Should You Be Before You Have Sex?

Responses: 150


Should It Happen?

I am 15 almost 16 and my boyfriend is 19. We have been together a little over a year and a half. We love eachother but i told him i wanted to hold off on sex bec im still in high school and i dont want the chance to be pregnant. He respects that. But every once in a long while we will get these feeling and we will both be like im ready bec i really love you. But then ill say im not ready then we stop. Im thinking im ready then when it gets to it its like NO i change my mind bec im scared.
—Guest Guest

Wait 4 the right time...plz

Don't do it bcz every1 else is doing it or bcz he wants u 2..sex wnt make him luv u more. Actually its the other way round. If u thnk u r ready,then why not?but if u r just doing it coz u want to make ur partner happy,u'll just end up with regrets. Do urself a favour,do it coz u want to not bcz of some1 else...:)
—Guest ladyT

Think..Can I handle what may happen?

I was having sex behind my parents' backs. When I was 15 I got pregnant.When i told my boyfriend this he was sure i was getting rid of it so, i did for him.I went through with the abortion behind everyones' back it was the hardest thing for me to do as I didn't want to get rid of my child but i felt pressured into it.The day I had the abortion and thought I got away with it my friend (who came with me to get it done) told my my mum what had happened.As you can imagine I was in so much trouble.You would have thought I would have learned my lesson from that situation but I didn't.I carried on having sex and now with the one person I do truly love but I got pregnant again and now i'm in the same stupid situation as before- pregnant at 16 and my parents don't even know i'm having sex.So, what i'm trying to say is just think about what may happen and what emotional things you may have to go through if it goes wrong.I thought I was safe both times as I am on the pill but it has faild me.
—Guest ThinkAboutIt

Be responsible!!!

I am 17 and last year i had sex with a guy i didnt even know ,that to me was very dissapointing,nd i felt that i was not incontrol of my life animore and that all happened because of what?.....alcohol!
—Guest Caroline

Don't until ready

I say wait. A LOT of guys will do anything to get into your pants. Wait for a guy that's willing to wait for you and actually loves you. Not just some random guy or anything. If you are just doin it cause you're curious than that's a dumb reason. If you're doin it cause your friends are that's a dumb reason. Also, if you do it before you are married ppl have a tendency to think you're a slut TRUST ME. I am a guy and I just hate seeing girls ruined and hurt by stupid stuff they did or by douche bag guys. It sucks. I've had this happen to real close friends. Don't put yourself in that situation.
—Guest Guest

respect and prioritized your career

SEX is not the matter that a young lady/man should talk to. They should focus on their career so it would not come on their mind to have this such of fool game. Honestly, I don't have any sexual interaction at my 26 y/o now, but I have a boyfriend. It is on the partner or between of you of how not to deal on it. As what I have did, I told him ahead of the time, in the early stage of our relationship, that I will not dare to do it unless we are already married. Then, as your partner respect you (girl), he can wait for this time you are referring to. Just lean on those activities that make both of you closer, but avoid ending this on making a sexual interaction. This is the stupid reason of most of the partners that sex deepens the relationship intimacy. It is both on your respect. And try not in to a relation if you are on the stage of achieving of your career. NOT INTO A RELATION if you want to be SOMEBODY, and you can avoid doing it at an early age of your life!
—Guest Jayiah Mae

Not just the age...

its not just the age that matters, its if you think your ready enough. If you want to because you are being pressured then get out of there right now! if you want to because you love that person then i think its okay. Just i say at least 14, otherwise its illegal, well at least where im from.
—Guest 16AndSteady

Help me

I'm 13 I want to have sex with my boyfriend and he also wants to have sex but I'm still unsure about losing our vurginities yet. I do love him with all my heart and he loves ne with all his heart too. We talk about how we would like to have sex but then I'm still unsure about having it because I'm 13 and he is 14 almost 15 . In scared of getting prego so I keep telling him that and I tell him that if my mother finds out that we are dating and it we have sex she will kill me! (btw my mother doesn't know I'm dating or that I have these feelings for him) so I don't know if we should or not >_<
—Guest Just a gurl

Respect before Interact

I am 17 years old and one of your everyday average teenagers that you see!I have a boyfriend and we aren't in love but we sure do have love for each other. Since I was thirteen I always wondered what was it like to experience my first time nut with so many diseases spreading through the world, it just makes me think twice o doing it. So my boyfriend and I made a decision to wait and on the right time to express our intimatcy of love. You know I don't want to come home and regret what I did but I want to come home and say I'm glad we did it. I want it to be special and I want us to BE COMMITED or AT LEATS IN A COMMITED RELATIONSHIP....No one lasts forever......With his being said I'm patiently waitng and I know (not for a fact tho) he's waiting to...I'm religious and he is too....but i just think your age limit doesn't matter as long as your old enough to understand the consquences and the hazards behind it (of what may become)....Your ready when ever you or your partner feel like it...
—Guest Joanne


Just as the saying goes ''Don't put the cart b4 the horse" cos the consequences will be greater on your path. Try very hard to wait till you reached the appropriate age. Am 19 but yet I think is not yet time for me to do it. I really do love my boyfriend and he loves me 2 but still he does not forced me to do it with him. Pls don't be intimidated by friends because you have not had sex. To be frank, some friends are jealous when they know that you are still......but keep on resisting them cos they will tell you all sort of lies just to persuade you. I strongly believe that there are men out there who have true luv for their partners besides sex just like my boyfriend. Let me share a friend's experience...she was involved in early sex and got her self pregnant. During her pregnancy period she was unable to feed herself expect she has to do odd jobs for her to survive, that just a tip of the iceberg. The worse occurred to her when she....
—Guest Melvina

When you are ready

Okay, so I know I titled it when you are ready. But, if you think you are ready and you're only 11 you shouldn't have sex. I am only in grade 8 and of course I have thought about having sex, but then I think first of all: there are like no people I would be interested in having sex with that would actually be interested in me too (LOL) and second: all the girls who have sex that are in my grade are called whores, sluts, etc. It's really not worth it to do it when you are young. I would say 15 AT THE YOUNGEST! but really, I'd wait until 17 or 18. No matter how much I like a guy or how much he SAYS he likes me. Also, don't have sex with a guy just because he wants you to. Or he says it'll make you cool. Do it when you want to. Don't let a guy force you into anything you don't want to do.
—Guest 123


I personally think 14-15 as youngest that is IF you think your ready. Now make sure you don't get the full experience so nothing bad will happen. Now you have to make sure your committed to that person. Also protection is the best thing to have. If your doing it just cus, don't! Your prolly not ready. The oldest to have it should be around 35-37 cus if any older, it's just plain awkward
—Guest Mayu


Can you look after a baby or pay for STD medication independently without your parents or welfare help? If the answer is NO, wait until your in collage to date. Concentrate on school, get high marks, get into college. THEN date.
—Guest P

What age

I think that you shold be at age 16/18. I am 11 and want to have sex but I am to young.
—Guest Jlee


I started wanting to be sexually active at a young age. I was 11 when I had my first cycle, so I felt I was ready to do whatever. 12-17 I played around, making out mostly heavy petting, nothing really big by most standards. I was raised Christian, so I always felt I was committing a sin, but frankly, didn't even care. I waited to have sex until I was 18. I wanted to wait longer, but I thought I was in love and was going to be with him forever. lol! I didn't feel anything different during or after sex. No "Explosions", not even pain...nothing! I felt cheated of pleasure. If I could go back, I would have waited until I was married instead of being with several partners after cheating on my first parter because I thought maybe he was the reason I didn't feel anything good from it. Flash forward 3 years, was engaged and had a baby out of wedlock. He left for drugs and other stupid stuff. I'm happily married 10 years now, still no boom! Use a vibrator, no drama, no guilt and more pleasure
—Guest MotherONature

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