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If You Caught Your Husband Cheating, Would You Forgive Your Unfaithful Spouse?

Most Americans Would Not Stand By Their Man...or Woman

By , About.com Guide

Updated September 22, 2009
With every politician exposed as a husband cheating on his wife -- often at taxpayer expense -- we examine our own lives and ask each other, "Would you forgive an unfaithful spouse?" It seems few of us would. And that shared sense of outrage is reinforced by a USA Today/Gallup poll that says over two-thirds of Americans would not forgive and forget the indiscretions of an unfaithful spouse.

In a survey conducted March 14-16, 2008, in the wake of the Eliot Spitzer scandal, Gallup found that there was little gender difference in the responses of women and men who were asked if they'd forgive a spouse involved in an extramarital affair:

  • 64% would not forgive (38% would definitely not forgive, and 26% would probably not forgive)
  • 62% would leave their spouse and get a divorce
  • 61% would not stand by their spouse at the podium if he/she were an elected official who had to answer media questions about the affair
Only 10% of those questioned in the survey would definitely forgive their unfaithful spouse.

When it comes to the type of infidelity the unfaithful spouse engages in -- a romantic affair or sex with a prostitute -- is one worse than the other? Interestingly, there's a clear gender split in this area:

  • 38% of women think paying to have sex with a prostitute is worse
  • 40% of men think having a romantic extramarital affair is worse
  • 30% of women and 24% of women think both are equally bad
Married respondents were significantly more likely to forgive their spouse (37%) and remain in the marriage (37%) than unmarried respondents. Of those, only 30% would forgive and only 25% would not divorce.

Source: Jones, Jeffrey M. "Most Americans Unwilling to Forgive Unfaithful Spouse." Gallup.com. 25 March 2008.

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